The Pursuit of Graciousness

Have you ever received a private question which you thought might need a public answer?

I did today. I will publish the Q&A below, changing names to protect the privacy of the inquiring young lady.

Q: “Hi Mrs. Campbell,
we’ve never met but I staffed TeenPact in (a state) with (one of my sons). He talked so much about you and (my daughter) Meg that I followed you to see why.
I hope this isn’t too out of turn, but I would like your advice.

I’ve been struggling for years to develop graciousness and kindness both in attitude and speech as a Christian.

May I ask how have you developed graciousness in your life? And raised gracious children?
I know you must be busy, so I won’t be offended if you choose not to reply.”

A: “Of course I will reply! It will more likely be a conversation, back-and-forth as we think and do.

Some general guidelines to achieve Beauty/Goodness/Truth:

1. Pray.
“You have not because you ask not.” James

2. Observe.
You have already, obviously, been doing this.

3. If you admire someone, ask yourself, “Why?” Try to pinpoint what appeals, then see if you can appropriate that into your own habits, speech, style.

4. Establish a guiding principle. Honor (of God and others) is mine. THAT is what leads to “graciousness.”

5. Consciously ask God each day (and throughout the day) in prayer, and ask yourself as well: “What am I doing/saying/thinking/wearing/cultivating/reading… (or not) that honors God and cultivates graciousness in my life?”

6. Make a list of this. Choose one to work hard on this week. Leave the others alone for the most part.

Of course I do not mean neglecting something that comes to your attention… Just do not try to get everything at once, or you may become overwhelmed and give up.

7. Speak Beauty, Goodness and Truth into the lives of others. Tell people what you like about them, or something they are doing.

8. Smile kindly.

This may be the most important habit you cultivate.

That will have to be all for now.  Let us keep up the conversation!

With kindest regards, Mrs. Nancy Campbell “

If you would like to be a part of this conversation, comment below or email me

With kindest regards,


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